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Fruits Hockey

Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2014 2:07 pm
by Watermelon
Think you have what it takes to be a Fruit? Fruits is now accepting applications for enrollment.


Should've thought about that when you made your account, scrub. Lucky for you, our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him) has decreed that anyone can be a Fruit. Being a Fruit is about the inside, not the outside.


Let me tell you.


Seeds: Our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him) gives us seeds so that we may pass them on. The seed represents unselfishness and teamwork.

Juice: Our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him) gives us juice so that we may be energized. The juice represents motivation, drive, and a will to win.

Skin: Our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him) gives us skin so that we may stay composed. The skin represents discipline and consistency.

With these three characteristics, YOU can become a Fruit.


Not yet, young one. For a Fruit is not a Fruit until he aligns with other Fruits. Together, we can make one hell of a smoothie. I mean team.

Current orchard:
Coach: Our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him)

Pearster (Proster)
Strawberry (Gozaburo)

Watermelon (Watermylawn)
PeterDLime (PeterDLai)
Vapricot (Vapour)
Pearster (Proster)
MrAppleEyes (MrAlertEyes)
Strawberry (Gozaburo)
Bulberry (Bulbasaur)
Crittron (Critt)
oRanginator (Ranchinator)
Figzerg (Blitzerg)
Cherrypopper (gigipopper)

Apply today for Fruits. If you don't, you're probably a communist.

The Juicerian Creed:

1. Thou shalt have no other foods before me.
Orchard hopping will not be tolerated. If you plant yourself in the orchard, and subsequently unplant yourself (leave voluntarily, not by accident), permission for re-planting cannot be promised.

2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven smurf, or any likeness of any player in thy community.
Bad-mannered name changing, or "smurfing", will not be tolerated. Do not change your username to purposefully mislead, confuse, or bm other players.

3. Thou shalt not take the name of the Fruits thy clan in vain.
Do not talk poorly about other Fruits. Handle disputes privately and maturely.

4. Honour thy mods and thy officers
Respect the authority of ZH developers, mods, and tournament hosts.

5. Thou shalt not BM
Do not be mean to other players for alleged lack of skill, experience, or stats.
Do not repeatedly make complaints about lag in-game or immediately after a loss, with the exception of instances where the lag can be fixed during a pause
Do not belittle others for their age, ethnicity, sexuality, intelligence, location, occupation, or clan.
Do not glitch out of the map in an inhouse.

6. Thou shalt not commit Fruidultery
Do not spread your seed at inappropriate times.

7. Thou shalt not bear false witness to thy pubs
Follow the creed in public games. Not only are you representing Fruits, but you are representing the Zealot Hockey community.

Fruits was rotten, but our Great Creator brought us back to ripeness. For Our Great Creator so loved the Orchard that he gave his only unrotten Plum, that whosoever puts seed in him shall not rot, but have everlasting juice.

For no longer are we regular Fruits. We are Fruits Reformed.

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2014 4:09 pm
by nochiFV
Quick question, who is our great creator (praise be unto him)?

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2014 4:37 pm
by Watermelon
We do not speak His name

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2014 11:49 pm
by brucecambell
ima make a team gallager..... gg

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Wed Mar 26, 2014 12:05 am
by Kurt_58
This is in fact the most productive post I have ever seen. Thank you for your contribution good sir.

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2014 3:03 am
by BroiledGrapefruit
We'd like to welcome Critt as our newest member of fruits!

May we blend well in order to best serve our Great Creator (Praise Be Unto Him).


And in the time it took me to actually post this post, we'd also like to welcome Scores to Fruits!

May our ripeness remain unending.

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:02 pm
by Scores
I just follow Critt and do what I'm told, I don't formulate opinions

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2014 4:20 pm
by Critt
Amazing paint skills, you should create a youtube tutorial

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Wed May 14, 2014 4:02 am
by Watermelon
Fruits is proud to welcome Reputed to the team!


Also, a late welcome for Peaches!

Re: Fruits Hockey

Posted: Sun May 18, 2014 10:47 pm
by Watermelon
Fruits welcomes Lemon, Townkrier, and Gil to the squad